What is independence?
Who is really independent?
We would all say that we want to be an independent individual.
But what we really mean is we want the autonomy to choose what parts of our lives we want to be independent in.
For me, it is important that I am independent in choosing when I go to bed or what drink I choose in the pub. I am a lot less bothered about being independent about ironing or fixing the electrics.
Supporting autistic people the use of independence as a goal is so often misused. Typical examples of goals: ‘tidy own bedroom… travel to college/work independently… learn to make a hot drink…’
Am I sure that these are really the choices of what independence means for that person rather than imposing what independence would mean for me?
So the goal should be to give someone autonomy over their own independence goals. And there is the real challenge: accurately understanding what the autistic person wants, their ambitions, and their priorities in life.
And that often is not easy.
It is easy to be misled by what you think you know about the person’s priorities.
Always useful to check with others, particularly with someone who will question your assumptions.
'No man is an island, entire of itself’
Every man is a piece of the continent, a part of the main’
John Donne 1623